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English Is A Stupid Language. - Poems For Review - Nairaland

Nairaland Forum / Entertainment / Literature / Poems For Review / English Is A Stupid Language. (5536 Views)

Short Story: I Must Really Be Stupid By Osarumen Edosa / Stupid Funny Quotes / Top Ten Funny/stupid Deaths (1) (2) (3) (4)

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English Is A Stupid Language. by Papadoh(m): 10:28am On Nov 28
There is no egg in eggplant
No ham in hamburger
And neither pine nor apple in pineapple
English muffins were not invented in England
French fries were not invented in France.

We sometimes take English for granted
But if we examine its paradoxes we find that
Quicksand takes you down slowly
Boxing rings are square
And a guinea pig is neither from guinea nor is it a pig.

If writers write, how come fingers don't fing
If the plural of tooth is teeth
Shouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth?
If the teacher taught, Why didn't the preacher praught?

If a vegetarian eats vegetables
What the heck does a humanitarian eat?!
Why do people recite at a play yet play at a recital?
Park on driveways and drive on parkways.

You have to marvel at the unique lunacy of a language where
A house can burn up as it burns down
And in which you fill in a form by filling it out
And a bell is only heard once it goes. When stars are out they are visible
But when lights are out they are invisible.

77 Likes 17 Shares

Re: English Is A Stupid Language. by MissJoy29(f): 1:15pm On Nov 28
Hmmmm....deep. Even though English language was my best subject in school and I also majored in it in the university, I still don't totally understand it. Don’t think I ever will. The rules are just too complex and confusing! shocked

15 Likes

Re: English Is A Stupid Language. by CyberGypsy(m): 2:37pm On Nov 28
Nice one !

2 Likes

Re: English Is A Stupid Language. by ladeb: 6:47am On Nov 29

2 Likes

Re: English Is A Stupid Language. by Noescrownoshow: 6:47am On Nov 29
How does this make English stupid

All these writers self and there wahala

1 Like

Re: English Is A Stupid Language. by KingLennon(m): 6:48am On Nov 29
I guessed you just wanted to sound funny. You try sha.





Manchester United for life let's go get arsenal this weekend

2 Likes

Re: English Is A Stupid Language. by God2man(m): 6:48am On Nov 29
I think so
Re: English Is A Stupid Language. by trustibk1(m): 6:48am On Nov 29
sad
Re: English Is A Stupid Language. by ct2(m): 6:50am On Nov 29
nice write up but
Re: English Is A Stupid Language. by Tonymario58: 6:50am On Nov 29
MissJoy29:
Hmmmm....deep. Even though English language was my best subject in school and I also majored in it in the university, I still don't totally understand it. Don’t think I ever will. The rules are just too complex and confusing! shocked
And you wasted your parent's money, evil child

3 Likes

Re: English Is A Stupid Language. by AHCB: 6:51am On Nov 29
Not bad. smiley

1 Like

Re: English Is A Stupid Language. by seacoast(m): 6:51am On Nov 29
Really creative, very critical and comprehensive.
I love it

8 Likes

Re: English Is A Stupid Language. by dalhjana: 6:55am On Nov 29
thumbs up bro. made sense

1 Like

Re: English Is A Stupid Language. by AvantG(m): 6:56am On Nov 29
Pains in my head gives me headache, pains in my stomach gives me stomach ache but pains in my leg doesn't cause legache....crazy language

4 Likes

Re: English Is A Stupid Language. by Tizbid(m): 6:56am On Nov 29
Noescrownoshow:
How does this make English stupid

Oga that writer the stupid one here

It's all about puns and wits....if u can sense either one in that poem,u will certainly find it quite interesting.

3 Likes

Re: English Is A Stupid Language. by sammoe(m): 6:56am On Nov 29
Papadoh:
There is no egg in eggplant No ham in hamburger And neither pine nor apple in pineapple English muffins were not invented in England French fries were not invented in France.
We sometimes take English for granted But if we examine its paradoxes we find that Quicksand takes you down slowly Boxing rings are square And a guinea pig is neither from guinea nor is it a pig.
If writers write, how come fingers don't fing If the plural of tooth is teeth Shouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth? If the teacher taught, Why didn't the preacher praught?
If a vegetarian eats vegetables What the heck does a humanitarian eat?! Why do people recite at a play yet play at a recital? Park on driveways and drive on parkways.
You have to marvel at the unique lunacy of a language where A house can burn up as it burns down And in which you fill in a form by filling it out And a bell is only heard once it goes. When stars are out they are visible But when lights are out they are invisible.
Lovely post, but please, give due credit. Thanks.

17 Likes 1 Share

Re: English Is A Stupid Language. by sammoe(m): 6:57am On Nov 29
.
Re: English Is A Stupid Language. by bsideboii(m): 6:57am On Nov 29
hahaha... its indeed a language of lunacy

1 Like

Re: English Is A Stupid Language. by Foxrain: 6:57am On Nov 29
Yet the poem was written in the supposed stupid language?
People lack talent these days. SMH.

2 Likes

Re: English Is A Stupid Language. by Luukasz(m): 6:58am On Nov 29
I haven't written poem in like almost a month now, but this just got me inspired to pick up the pen and lay down the flow.
This poem is one of the best i've read this year and its my poem of the month

3 Likes

Re: English Is A Stupid Language. by Nebes: 6:58am On Nov 29
Funny

1 Like

Re: English Is A Stupid Language. by xamiel: 7:02am On Nov 29
Right.

1 Like

Re: English Is A Stupid Language. by MrFly: 7:02am On Nov 29
KingLennon:
I guessed you just wanted to sound funny. You try sha.





Manchester United for life let's go get arsenal this weekend
d difference btw Watford and Arsenal is clear.. LACAZETTE is waiting to devour Lindelof
Re: English Is A Stupid Language. by leofirms: 7:02am On Nov 29
Please mods make a correction....this poem wasn't written by papadoh as you claim.

I know this cause it's one of my best poem and have been reading it since year 2008.

Checkout the link below

http://www.estnt.com/amp/s/geekyteacher.wordpress.com/2008/09/30/english-language-poems/amp/

So Lalasticlala ishilove seun Mynd44 Dominique kindly make due corrections

2 Likes

Re: English Is A Stupid Language. by AgentOfAllah: 7:03am On Nov 29
English may be a stupid language, but at least it knows that plagiarism is wrong!

Plagiarism pley-juh-riz-uh m: An act or instance of using or closely imitating the language and thoughts of another author without authorization and the representation of that author's work as one's own, as by not crediting the original author.

10 Likes 2 Shares

Re: English Is A Stupid Language. by Luukasz(m): 7:04am On Nov 29
MissJoy29:
Hmmmm....deep. Even though English language was my best subject in school and I also majored in it in the university, I still don't totally understand it. Don’t think I ever will. The rules are just too complex and confusing! shocked
One of the reasons why school and academics is overrated, many folks are in school while some outta school and they dont even really understand their course.
Even someone who didn't study their course or goes to school, know better than they do
Re: English Is A Stupid Language. by MrFly: 7:06am On Nov 29
Lovely... U just made this beautiful morning interesting.
Re: English Is A Stupid Language. by Abass07(m): 7:08am On Nov 29
So illarious
Re: English Is A Stupid Language. by Exumasdas: 7:23am On Nov 29
Don't ask Nairaland members for contact details (email, phone, bbpin) or investments.
Re: English Is A Stupid Language. by justclinton: 7:26am On Nov 29
Baba u just did - (ctrl + c) and (ctrl + v). nice post, weihdone sir.
Re: English Is A Stupid Language. by emeka2847: 7:26am On Nov 29
Ha
Re: English Is A Stupid Language. by bayocanny: 7:37am On Nov 29
Funny enough, you used English Language for your write-up

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